A whirlwind birth

My previous doctor, the late dr Emmanualle Bareiro-Duarte used to tease me that the 6th kid would be free. I would just laugh at him especially after Yusuf was born and he kept saying he would see me again soon. Little did I know that I would in fact be contacting his office less than a year later only to discover that he had sadly passed away in his sleep shortly after being diagnosed with cancer. It was just last year that he delivered little Yusuf into this world, almost missing the birth because he was born so quickly. He jokingly told us that next time I would give birth in the parking lot. And guess what...I almost did!

Yaasier and I had a sense that this little man was in a hurry to join our family so we expected he would be born before his due date, but not a whole 2 weeks! My last doctors appointment was on tuesday and I said to her that I didn't think I would last another 2 weeks. But I expected I would at least make it to my next appointment which was scheduled for next tuesday. But just as short and fast as this pregnancy was made known to us, as quickly did little Uthmaan make his appearance...half a pregnancy and half the labour time...

It all started on wednesday night at about midnight when I experienced some really bad lower back pain. But I was still able to sleep and still able to see to Yusuf when he woke for his bottle at 3am. It was only at about 6am that I felt my first contraction. But it was mild enough that I could still tend to Sumayah when she woke up crying and mild enough that I was able to go downstairs to make myself some tea. However the regularity of the contractions made me stop to take note and the intensity started to increase quite quickly. By the time I finished drinking my tea I had timed non stop contractions of 30 seconds duration every 5 minutes. So I went upstairs to tell Yaasier. He was busy getting ready for work so I decided to take a hot shower to see if the contractions would subside. They didn't. They continued to get more intense and started to last longer. So we knew...this was the day. Quickly we had to put arrangements in place for the other kids in the event I was still in labour late afternoon. As it happens both Sumayah and Bilaal were home sick. Fortunately we had Abigail on her way who would be there with the kids when we went to hospital but she could only stay till 4pm. My neighbour kindly made herself available from 4pm onwards despite having 2 young kids of her own. The problem was that the au pair who normally comes from 5pm till 8pm just so happened to have an exam that evening so she wasn't available. But judging by the progression of labour we were expecting baby to be born by 4pm latest...little did we know...baby had other plans!

While waiting for Abigail to arrive I tried to make sure I had everything I needed in my hospital bag, which I was so relieved I packed just the week before. We also phoned all our loved ones from the UK to the Cape to let them know what was happening. But by the time Abigail arrived at 8.30am labour was in full swing. Bilaal was super excited, but Sumayah didn't understand what was happening. I recall bracing myself on the kitchen table in excruciating pain and Sumayah nonchalantly asking me 'mommy, are you going to make me something to drink?' Bilaal got so annoyed with her and reprimanded her 'how can mommy make you something to drink, she's gna have a baby, can't you see she's in pain?!' And then he proceeded to ask me where does the baby come out! While Yaasier was getting my bags upstairs I suddenly started feeling the urge to push so I decided to get in the car so long and recall shouting from the garage 'Yaasier! We need to leave now!' Poor Yaasier was moving as fast as he could all the while I'm telling him 'we need to get to the hospital NOW! But don't drive so fast...slow down...just get to the hospital quick! Aaaah!' Fortunately the hospital is just 5 minutes from our house and as we approached the entrance I said 'I'm not going to be able to walk in!' So Yaasier just left his car in the drop off zone at the hospital entrance to help me in and I just plonked myself into the first wheelchair I saw and shouted at the security guard 'go quickly!' We arrived in the maternity ward at about 9am and as we approached the nurses station I shouted 'I can feel I need to push! Dr Loock!'

There was a huge rush and scramble with a flurry of activity all around me it was all hands on deck! I recall hearing someone say 'lets just first get her bottoms off or this baby's gna be born in her pants...' I had one person pulling off my boot, one pulling off my bottoms, another person trying to put on my hospital gown and a whole bunch of scrambling around to  get me on the bed and prepped for birth. Then I hear the nursing sister say  'ok just move her into delivery now I can see the head!' No kidding! The sensation to push was getting stronger! As they rush me into the delivery room knocking into walls and doorways on the way I remember hearing one of the nurse's phones ringing to the song 'ice ice baby...so now stop, collaborate and listen...' while the nurses are telling me not to push yet and me shouting in pain. And then suddenly...no pain...the calm before the storm...I could see the waters bulging and the next second I felt a really strong contraction coming on. My waters burst and within seconds, at 9.13am baby popped out onto the bed crying his healthy little lungs out just as my doctor ran into the room.

And that is how Uthmaan Abrahams made himself known to the world...tiny, vernix covered perfection. I looked up at dad and knew that we were both instantly in love with our new little man. One of my favourite moments after every birth is watching Yaasier brim with pride and instant love for both baby and me. He's always so filled with admiration for me yet I know that I would not have the strength I have without him by my side. And we will need each other now more than ever now that we are officially parents of 4!

And Yusuf was born!

Its been three weeks since my last post and as promised this one will be dedicated to the birth story óf little Yusuf Abrahams. As I write this post I am lying with him snugly curled up aginst my chest sleeping like a little angel. I can't believe he is 3 weeks already and that I am actually a mother of 3! The funny thing about pregnancy and birth is that no matter how gatvol (to my foreign readers that means fed up) you are of being pregnant, no matter how ready you are to pop, when the day arrives and your impending delivery is in sight, you feel so unprepared and nervous and excited and a whole bunch of other feelings all rolled into one huge heap of emotion. When I think back and reflect on any of my births I remember the finer details of the day very clearly, but the memory of the experience is still so surreal. Its like I was present in the moment, but not fully aware of the whirlwind that I was part of.

Interestingly my birth experience with Yusuf was very similar to Bilaals, because the progression of my labour was almost identicle! It started out a normal day getting up at 6 to wake Bilaal for school and prepare his breakfast and lunch. Just before Yaasier and Bilaal left at about 7 I started feeling discomfort that cameand went very quickly. With weeks od prelabour niggles I didn't immediately have the light come on that this was a contraction, but then it happened again, and again, and again. It wasn't painful just uncomfortable, but increasingly so, so at this point I remembered that the same thing happened when I went into labour with Bilaal. I also woke at 7am with similar discomfort. Yaasier and Bilaal had left already and Sumayah was still asleep so I decided to lie on the bed and time what I now suspected were mild contractions. in the mean time I was furiously googling signs and symptoms of labour (one would think I would know all this 3rd time round!) and was messaging my good friend about what was happening. Yaasier was an hour away on a conference and I wasn't sure if I should call him all the way back in the even it was a falso alarm. I struggled to time them at first because I kept being interrupted or forgetting to press the stopwatch and start it again etc. Then Sumayah also woke up and I had to get her ready for school. By this time I think I pretty much knew instinctively that this was the real deal, but I remembered how Sumayah sent us back and forth to the hsopital 3 time before the show began so I wanted to be absolutely certain. So with contractions still going at very regular intervals and starting to get more and more uncomfortable heading toward the pain end of the spectrum, I got Sumayah ready for school and dropped her off. Fortunately her school is literally down the road so I only had 2 maybe 3 contractions there and back. But that's how mild they were, I could still comfortably drive, talk to the teacher, and hug and kiss my girl. But as soon as I got home I lay on the bed and focussed solely on timing these darn buggers that were now steadily increasing in intensity. I called Yaasier and let him know what was happening, at this point it was clear that these were contractions and they were not tapering off. They were about 10 minutes apart and each one lasted about a minute. I phoned the doctor who said I should come into the maternity ward to be monitored. So Yaasier made his way back home. I was convinced I would be monitored at hospital and then they would send me home to come back later in the day. But alas that was not to be. When Yaasier arrived he first had to collect Sumayah from school before we could go to hospital, which fortunately is also only 5 minutes away. While there the nurse informed us that I was already 4 cm dilated! Yaasier then had to rush off to fetch Bilaal at school and drop him at home. It seemed like ages that he was gone. I don't think he realised how much of a rock of support he is to me during times like these. By this time the pain from each contraction was really intense, so I distracted myself with facebook and Blackberry messages. So amny of my family and friends knoew I was in labour as it was happening! While waiting for Yaasier the nurse informed me that as soon as he arrived they would break my waters to speed things up because my labour was progressing quite quickly as it was so she was sure our littel angel would make an appearance soon. Yaasier was quite taken aback to hear this when he arrived. The nurses were busy with another birth and while we waited Yaasier distracted me with his funny remarkss while I rocked on a gym ball through each pain.

Finally the final hours hour arrived. I was wheeled into the delivery room and was found to be 8cm dilated already. The breaks between contractions were starting to dwindle till eventually it felt like just one continous contraction. Then the nurse announced that it was almost time to push and that she would break my waters. It is the strangest feeling, that urge to push. It's like you have no control over the feeling and yet you are also in total control of whether you push or not. The doctor hadn't arrived yet and the nurses said that if I felt I neede to push that I should just go ahead. Just after the doctor arrived, 3 pushes, a lot of screaming and some bone crunching of Yaasier's hand later, and our beautiful 3.16kg baby boy was born at 15h40 on Wednesday 7 March.

And now here I am a proud mother of 3, enjoying my babymoon with Yusuf.

It has been written...

As you may know, I have been impatiently awaiting the arrival of the new Abrahams baby. Partly due to excitement, partly due to the sheer discomfort of waddling around like a whale in the kalahari in this Jozi heat... not to mention the prelabour aches and pains I've been having on and off for 2 weeks already. But yesterday something changed... perhaps it was the calm that entering the final week till due date brings or perhaps it really is the clarity of thought I have been needing all along. While lying awake in the darkness with my good friend preggy insomnia to keep me company the words "It has been written" sprung to mind. I have been driving myself potty googling the signs of labor hoping to catch a glimpse into my future and predict when baby will arrive, reading up all kinds of words of wisdom on how to get things started. But I realised... or rather I always knew, but finally accepted yesterday that no matter what we do, there are certain things that have already been written... the date you will be born being one of them. Some might argue 'but what about those who have elective c-sections?' Well think about it even then, there will always be circumstances around that decision that will limit your choice of date. So if I had to march into my doctors office this morning and demand that I would like this baby out right away and would like a c-section, it's not like he will just drop everything and voila the birthdate is decided upon. I would still need to be assessed and the doctor's schedule, hospital bookings anaethetist and many other factors, will have to come together to come to a date... a date that has already been written. So while lots of walking and some other kinky suggestions usually recommended to naturally induce labor may well bring me closer to the ultimate event... in the end baby will still only be born when he is meant to be born... on the date it has been written.

So in the mean time I shall kick back and relax while I now patiently await the big event. The not knowing when or how is after all what makes it all so exciting! At least that's what I tell myself while I shift my position to find a more comfortable once again, to no avail.