insomnia strikes again!

1.5 hours! That's how long it took for Sumayah my little insomniac to fall asleep! I cannot describe what that feels like to me. It starts with annoyance, then progresses to irritation, which mounts into frustration, till I become so overwhelmed that I just want to cry! About an hour after trying everything from walking with her to sitting to lying, with rocking and patting to singing and praying, and still watching her eyes droop and roll but never shutting... At this point I normally tell myself that if she's not sleeping within the next 15 minutes I'm giving up. Only to find myself half an hour later still trying and eventually she does fall asleep. But there' been times when I have found myself feeling hopeless after 2 hours of feeling frustrated alone in the dark and then just bringing her out of the room awake and ready to play! What adds to the frustration is that there doesn't seem to be a logical reason that she struggles to fall asleep. She's not crabby... On the contrary, she lies quietly and you can see her teetering on the edge of blissful slumber but no amount of pushing on my part will get over to fall in. Her eyes will roll close momentarily, sparking in me some hope, only for her to roll her lids back up again. I really don't know what to do about this except to hope that she will outgrow this problem... Hopefully soon!

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Spoke too soon?

So as I feared, my celebrations on yesterday's post was a little premature. Last night the sleep battles resumed. The funny thing is when I was putting her to sleep for the night I already knew what kind of night was ahead. This time it wasn't related to the separation anxiety I don't think. When I was putting her to sleep it was just clear that she was very restless. No amount of rocking or swaying could get her to calm down enough to fall into a deep sleep. So naturally at around 10pm she was awake again. I was on the phone with a friend so Yaasier went up and put her back to sleep. But I knew right there and then what kind of night was awaiting me. Even when I picked her up and held her in my arms in the bed, she still couldn't sleep. Her eyes would be closed, but she wasn't asleep. Eventually at about 2.30am I went downstairs to give her some rescue remedy and then got back into bed and slept with her in my arms the rest of the night. Of course the last thing I needed was to be told this morning that I should keep the volume down because I am disturbing the neighbours with my frustrated moanings that Sumayahs should "just shut up and sleep for god's sake " and stomping down the stairs and angry closing of cupboard doors in my frustration. Now mind you I know the house is very quiet so all my annoying sounds are amplified, but was I really loud enough to wake the neighbours? I don't think so... maybe to disturb the people who are warm and snug under the blankets in my own house yes, but I hardly think I was 'shouting' or 'banging' doors. So naturally this morning I was in a rather foul mood.

But I made myself a good brekkie and have turned to ranting to the blogosphere to calm me down. Now for a lovely long hot shower and I will be ready to face the day.