Thump in the night!

During the course of the night Sumayah usually ends up in bed with us. I really don't mind, but now that we are fasting and need to wake up at 4.30am to eat breakfast before the sun rises, it can pose a slight problem. Let us take this morning as an example. When the alarm went off, Sumayah was sound asleep in the bed and we were left with the predicament... do we leave her undisturbed in the bed knowing that she may roll off or wake for her bottle and fall off?... or do we pick her up to put her in her cot and risk waking her and end up with a little bright-eyed girl sitting regop at the breakfast table at 4.30 in the morning asking for a slice of our toast?

I looked at Yaasier and mouthed out quietly, "do you think we can leave her in the bed?" He nodded yes and that was that. I placed the pillow around her and we went downstairs. About half hour later while enoying a pastrami sandwich, we heard a Thump! Yaasier and i looked at each other and Yaasier asked, "Did Sumayah just fall off the bed now?" which was immediately followed by the sound of Sumayah crying. i flew up the stairs faster than I knew possible and when I entered the dark room I saw the shape of a tiny head on the other side of the bed looking around the room.

Shampies man she looked so small and vulnerable, but actually wasn't crying much. I don't think she really got hurt, more just of a fright and very annoyed. So we darem ended up sitting with her at the breakfast table, poor thing!

Once Bitten, Twice Shy!

Yesterday I took the kids to the local park. There was a cute little boy there with a lovely, friendly mommy. We chatted briefly while our kids braved the climbing structure. According to her the little boy is 16 months, only 2 months older than Sumayah. We parted as our kids explored the rest of the park in different directions, but then a little while later Sumayah spotted the little boy again and approached him. The boy's mom was sitting a few centimetres away on one side of them and I was standing a few centimetres away on the other side of them. I could see Sumayah wanted to hug the boy and he wanted to hug her too but as they leaned in toward each other Sumayah lost her balance and fell on her bottom. She didn't cry and I reassured her from where I was standing that it was okay and that the boy just wanted to hug her. Then, as if in slow  motion I saw him lean down toward her, put his arms around her in a loving embrace and then gave her a huge haps on her cheek! This cute little boy was biting my girl! By the time I managed to pull her away he had already left an ugly bite mark on her cheek, but fortunately no blood! Sumayah of course cried and the boy's mom quickly jumped up, apologised and asked if he pushed her because she didn't see him bite her. I just said 'no he bit her'and walked away to console Sumayah away from the boy. While I was playing with Sumayah on the other side of the park I noticed the mom's daughter arrived from her ballet lesson and then they left.

Now I have no ill feelings toward the little boy or the mother in fact. He is still only a baby and at that age biting is a common problem that develops. It could just as easily have been Sumayah who did the biting. She does after all tend to bite Bilaal when he frustrates her! But it did get me thinking, what is the appropriate response in this situation, on either side? I was so shocked in the first instance and then focussed on Sumayah and consoling her that I had no time to say anything to the mom. But only now in retrospect do I wonder to myself... shouldn't she have come to see if Sumayah was okay? If it was Sumayah who bit another child, I would've been profusely apologising to the other mom and making sure that the other kid was okay. But I don't know if she didn't hear me or if she didn't believe me, if she was embarrassed, or maybe she just didn't care (which I doubt), but this mom just carried on as though nothing happened!

All I know is I will be very reluctant to encourage hugs and kisses from other kids from now on. As the saying goes, 'once bitten, twice shy'!

Wordless Wednesday 30

Fire Scare!

On Saturday night one of those things happened that I never thought ever would ... being such a uber responsible supermom and all (read with much sarcastic undertone). Yaasier had a lussie for popcorn, but seeing as all the microwave popcorn was up, I had to go back to old school oil-in-the-pot method. I have been very scatterbrained these last couple of weeks I don't know why, but this was really the cherry on top. I put the oil in the pot and smugly announced my old-fashioned popcorn-making knowledge by telling Yaasier that the secret to good pot popcorn is to let the oil get hot before adding the popcprn kernels so that the kernels don't absorb too much oil before popping. So while waiting for the oil to heat up I watched a bit of telly. Not long and I suddenly saw a faint smoke waft pass the light! I asked Yaasier very ignorantly, "what's that smoke?"... and then it dawned on me, "Oh shit! I forgot about the oil on the stove!"

I ran to the stove and saw the smoke filling up under the glass pot lid. Now I know how fire operates and despite thinking that it would never happen to me, I also always thought I would know exactly how to react in the event it did. The thing is when your fight/flight mechanism kicks in you sometimes tend to forget valuable knowledge. See when I saw the smoking pot what I should've done is turn off the stove, place a wet cloth over the lid and immediately take it outside to cool down before opening the lid.

Instead my immediate reaction when I saw the pot was to remove the lid and put on the extractor fan... DOH! How dumb was I? Anybody who knows the first thing about fire knows that the worst thing you can do for a potential fire is to expose it to oxygen! Not only did I expose the burning oil to oxygen, but I extracted the flammable fumes further into the air! So of course the pot caught alight!

Fortunately I quickly regained some good sense and gave Yaasier a cold lid to cover the flame with and turned off the exctractor fan, and removed the pot outside. Of course by then the whole downstairs was filled with smoke. Yaasier brought the huge fan down, we opened all the windows and doors and made sure all the doors to the rooms upstairs were closed so that the smoke couldn't penetrate the rooms where the children were sleeping. My eyes were burning, my throat was burning, but worst of all while we sat in the cold waiting for the smoke to clear I was wandering aimlessly up and down feeling racked with guilt and completely useless and irresponsible. It may have been a small little flame that was completely controllable, but I kept thinking that it could have been so much worse! I was so ashamed and upset with myself for allowing such a totally avoidable thing to happen. I almost didn't want to blog about this, but then I thought 'suck it up Tasneem, others can learn from your stupidity'. So here are some very important tips that hopefully nobody will ever need:

When discovering a fire or potential fire in the home:

1. Stay CALM
2. Assess the severity and if you have any doubt whatsoever that you can get it under control, evacuate the house immediately!
3. If you are absolutely certain that you can tackle the small blaze, assess the type of fire and act accordingly

There are 3 main types of fires:

• Paper/wood/clothing/other material: it is safe to douse this type of fire with water
• cooking oil/fat: DO NOT open the lid of the pot, if the pot is already open when a flame erupts, either put a lid over it or throw a damp cloth over the fire and turn off the stove. NEVER throw water over this type of fire, the burning fat will splatter possibly harming you or even spreading the fire!
• Electrical: FIRST switch off the mains! The best way to tackle an electrical flame is to cover it with BICARBONATE OF SODA. NEVER throw water on an electrical flame or one that is near to an electrical socket or you WILL SHOCK!

Finally it is important to know how to react in the event of minor skin burns. It is handy to have some burnshield spray or swabs on hand. In the old days when you burned yourself on the stove or the iron the older generation always used to put butter on the wound... WRONG!WRONG!WRONG!!! this is the worst thing you can do! Butter coats the burn and creates an ideal environment for bacteria thereby increasing the chance for infection. You also should not put ice on the burn as it may damage the skin further and do not put a bandage on the wound as it will delay healing time. The best thing you can do is to keep the area under cold running water for at least 5 minutes. If the burn is very minor you may then afterward cover the area with a healing cream such as aloe vera for some relief and to speed up the healing process.

Of course it all also depends on the severity of the burn and the cause. You can visit this link for more info: First Aid for Burns

All that being said, Prevention is Better than Cure! So please learn from my stupid mistake and DO NOT FORGET about the oil on the stove!

Love Me!

With Rights comes Responsibilities!

I am pissed! Angry! But also sad! What has evoked such strong reactions? The strike. Now don't get me wrong, in principle I whole heartedly support the strike. Of course the health care and teaching proffessions are underpaid and undervalued. I come from a whole family of teachers. Both Yaasier's parents are teachers, almost all his aunts, I have cousins, uncles and aunts who are teachers, I have many nurse friends, so I totally see where they are coming from with their demands. But the problem with many South Africans is that we are very quick to point out what our rights are, but almost always seem to just as easily forget that with those rights come responsibilities. Just as everyone participating in the strike are entitled to execute this right, so those who have chosen not to participate are entitled to exercise their right. In addition those who exercise the right to assemble and demonstrate have the responsibility to do so 'unarmed and peacefully'.

So I get really angry when I hear stories on the news about premature babies being abandoned in hospitals, 2 babies consequently dying! Or the ambulance driver whose been driving around for 3 hours with a pregnant woman in critical condition  because he's been turned away from every hospital he's gone to. And what about the ambulance that was turned away transporting a man who needed urgent surgery because his hand was chopped off!!! Yes that's right his hand was chopped off and if he didn't get surgery within the 'golden hour' the tissue would die, but the striking 'health care' workers wouldn't allow them through! Now you tell me how is that any different from taking people hostage and demanding ransom in exchange for life??! Last time I checked being a hostage taker was a crime, so in my mind when you hold the lives of patients ransom you are no different. I have colleagues working at Baragwanath hospital who were yesterday barracading into the building because they had the nerve to turn up to work!

And then there are those poor matriculants who are writing their finals in 2 months time! The sad thing is it is the most disadvanteged schools where the scholars are particularly vulnerable to the poverty cycle that are affected most. I remember when I was at school there were also times when teachers were striking against all the retrenchments that were taking place at the time and we all supported them in their strike, but then they had the decency to put contingency plans in place so our work would't suffer too much. All you need is 1 parent out of a classroom on 30-40 children to 'babysit' the class and the teacher to set enough work to keep them busy for the time of the strike and you're sorted.

I just feel that just as their are many many hardworking, dedicated teachers and nurses who genuinely care about the society and purpose that they serve, equally, maybe even more so there are those who are in the profession purely for the pay cheque, who really don't give a damn! Believe me I have worked with enough lazy-ass miserable nurses who hate their jobs and treat their patients like shit. I have also come across many teachers who are just as bad. And the sad thing is they taint the reputations and beauty of all those teachers and nurses who always give their all. But I also balme the unions for allowing the strike to get out of control, for not approaching the situation with more maturity.

So I'd like to say to each and every person responsible for denying others their  rights by blocking their access to essential health services or denying a child the right to an education that could be his/her key to escaping the cycle of poverty... Shame on You!!! Every single person that dies due to lack of services... their blood is on your hands! Yes that's right I'm calling you murderers! How does is feel to know that you are responsible for the death of 2 babies? If you get your wage demands met, I really hope that extra 1% increase will be worth it!

And that's just my 2 cents!

Wordless Wednesday 29

Part 2 of 'Midgets and Swear Words'

What are the chances that Bilaal would have not 1 but 2 embarrass-your-parent encounters with a midget?! I refer to a previous post titled midgets and swear words where I describe an incident where Bilaal 'confronted' a midget about his size. Well!... the other day Bilaal went with Yaasier to the bank and while they were in the queue he spotted a midget entering the bank. Bilaal innocently turned to his dad and remarked:
"Daddy? I wonder how that small lady got here, she couldn't have drove here because she won't be able to see over the steering wheel." If that was not embarrassing enough Bilaal then added, "and in any case her feet won't be able to reach the pedals."

'Nuff said.

Wordless Wednesday 28

Verbal Upgrade

One of the joys of parenting is that you get to experience first hand the wonder of human development. It never ceases to amaze me how you can one day be overjoyed at the outcome of pee on a stick and the next thing you know you have this little person running around becoming more and more independent and growing into their very own distinct personality! It seems now that Sumayah has got the walking down she has turned her attention to talking. For a long time now she has been saying 'mama', 'dada', 'baba', 'ta' and 'up'. But then suddenly this week she decided to do a verbal upgrade. 'Dada' has now become 'da-ddi?' (yes always with an inflection at the end), she has said 'B-lal' a few times, and calls Abegail (her nanny) 'Abi'.

Tonight we were also astounded by how much she actually understands. After supper Yaasier said to Sumayah, 'go fetch the ball for dada' and just as I was getting up to show her where the ball was she walked over to the toy box, picked up the ball and brought it to Yaasier. Yaasier and I just looked at each other in proud amazement. She also tends to say 'up' whenever she wants to go out and will often lead us by the hand to the outside gate and say 'up, up'. But the thing that amazes me most is her level of problem solving. Whenever the sliding door to the garden is closed she would stand on her toes trying to reach up to the key hole with the housekeys. I simply put this down to role-modelling. But one day I witnessed with my own eyes how she pushed one of Bilaal's plastic Jolly chairs to the sliding door, house key in hand and proceeded to climb onto the chair so she could reach the key hole! I stood watching her, too dumbfounded to remove her from this clearly dangerous stunt for a 12 month old. Of course she fell off the chair and cried, but was soon trying to get back up again. We now leave the plastic chair outside... not that that stops her from climbing on the coffee table!

wordless wednesday 27

I'm gonna moo you!

When Bilaal was still a wee lad learning all the various animal sounds, he would hook onto a favourite and then use it all the time. I blogged about an incident with the 'quack' sound in a previous post where I described the embarrassment he caused me because he instead used to say 'kak'. Well when it came to the cow sounds there was never any problem there. He always used to moo at us and say 'I'm gonna moo you', followed by a very animated 'mooo!' Of course we found this amusing, one because he was so adorable when he mooed and two because it sounded as though he was saying 'I'm gonna moer you', but since we were in the UK it didn't matter because the English wouldn't know this. So we used to laugh and continue our bemusement everytime he said this, which of course true to Pavlovian theory reinforced the behaviour. Naturally as his communication skills advanced, he outgrew this little game and proceeded to drive us nuts with incessant talking and questions. Well... for some reason Bilaal has recently re-adopted this phrase recently and at first when he used to say it in the house I didn't really bother much about it because of course I know the story behind it. But then one day the neighbour's kid was at our house and while they were playing I heard Bilaal saying to the boy, 'I'm gonna moo you, i'm gonna moo you!'. And then I realised, what if this kids goes to tell his parents and it is totally misunderstood. And then the following day we were getting out of the car at the shops and Bilaal says to me very loudly and with much zeal, 'Mommy, I'm gonna moo you, I'm gonna moo you mommy!' That turned a few heads! So when we arrived home I had to explain to him why he shouldn't say that anymore and thankfully so far he's listened!

AWOL

16 days! That's how long it's been since my last post! It's so true that you only realize the true value of something when it's gone. While blogger may not be gone, the damn internet certainly was missing in action over the last 2 weeks. There were so many little things I wanted to blog about but alas!

And then I get a pleasant surprise from a fellow blogger Simply Mel who commented on a previous post enquiring how me and the kids were. Wow that just warmed my heart, thanks Mel! Sure I know there are many people I know that read my blog, but it's wierd how much I really value these cyber interactions with people I have never even met. It a strange thing the connection I feel toward some of the bloggers I regularly follow. I worry when their kids are ill and feel immense pride when they do something great. I feel happy when good things happen in their lives and disappointed when things don't go their way.

So thanks all my blogger buddies. Thank you for the new perspective, thank you for the comments and variety of opinions, for making me laugh and yes even the times I felt a little teary eyed.